The Torture Room
by Lextacy
Summary: Welcome to The Torture Room where me and my friend The Mytical Kid ask questions that make people upset and pissed .
1. Episode 1

Lex: Before I start I'd like to get one thing straight , I do not own any character of Inuyasha , well maybe a couple , but they're in the story . ;) .  
  
Lex: Welcome to The Torture Room ! (thunder cracks in background)  
  
Muhahahahahahahahaha !!!!! Everybody welcome my odd friend The Mystical Kid !!  
  
Audience: HURRAY !!!!!  
  
T.M.K. : Yo Yo what up peeps ?  
  
Lex: Today we're going to tormenting people with questions .  
  
T.M.K.:Yea , so everybody betta enjoy themselves ya hear ?   
  
Lex: T.M.K. you really need to stop actin black .  
  
T.M.K.: Naw dawg ! I'll act the hell I want to , ya dig ?  
  
Lex: Yea I hear you , I hesr your jaw flabbin still !   
  
Audience: Hahahahahaha !!!!!!  
  
T.M.K.: Lets just get thes ugly hos out here already , I'm bored .  
  
Lex: (rolls eyes) Lets bring out Inuyasha !!  
  
(Inuyasha walks to chair that T.M.K. has pointed to)  
  
Lex: So Inuyasha how does it feel to be in a love triangle ?  
  
T.M.K.: Ya , how it feel ?  
  
Lex: Shut Up !!!!!!  
  
T.M.K: Shuttin ......  
  
Inuyasha: I have no clue what you're talkin about .  
  
Lex: You know Kagome and Kikyo ......  
  
Inuyash: (gulp)  
  
Lex: Simple question , do you feel good about loving to people at once?  
  
Inuyasha: No , I don't love anybody except myself !!!  
  
Audience: Booooooooo!!!!  
  
T.M.K.: Man you a tru playa !  
  
(Lex gives T.M.K. death glare)  
  
T.M.K.: Neva mind .  
  
Lex: Inuyahsa.....buddy (puts hand on Inuyasha's shoulder) you know you're going to have to pick one , right ?  
  
Inuyasha: I don't want neither ! They waste my time anyways !  
  
Lex: Ok bed that way !! Now you get either ! I'm going to file a restraining order on you . You may contact either women or have anything to do with them . Now have a good day .  
  
T.M.K.: Dammmmn ain't she mean ?  
  
(guards escort Inuyasha out of studio)  
  
Lex: Man that felt good !!!  
  
T.M.K.: Ok are next peep to come up in here is my main man , Miroku !!  
  
(Girls start throwing underwear on stage , ewwwwww a granny just did it )   
  
Miroku: Calm down ladies , theres enough Miroku for everybody . ;)  
  
Lex: Riiiight .....  
  
T.M.K.: Ok , whats with touchin everyone , don' t you have feelins fo a lucky lady ?   
  
Miroku: I do have feelings for her , but sence my hand is cursed I'm trying to enjoy my life before I die . Besides I'm a ladies man .  
  
(Girls in audience cheer)  
  
T.M.K.: Playa , playa . Whos the lucky lady then ?  
  
Miroku: No comment .  
  
Lex: Tell us or I'll ...  
  
Miroku: Noooo! Not my gumdrop buttons , wait wrong show , or you'll do what ?  
  
Lex: I'll find her and kill her .  
  
Miroku: Nooo not my darling Sango !!!  
  
Lex&T.M.K.: We Knew It !!!!!!  
  
Miroku: Please don't tell her !   
  
T.M.K.: Most likely she already know . Now get outta here ! I'm done talkin to your playa face !!!!  
  
(Miroku runs out of studio burstin out in tears )   
  
Lex: Well thats it for to day .  
  
T.M.K.: Check in next time for Kouga and Sesshomaru ! Piece ! We outy!  
  
Lex: Oi shut up !!!  
  
T.M.K.: Shuttin ..... 


	2. Episode 2

Lex: Hello everybody and welcome for another episode of The Torture Room ! (thunder booms in background and lightning strikes)   
  
TMK:You know you should really stop with that ....geez .  
  
Lex: Hey you're not talking black anymore ! What happened ?  
  
TMK: Nothing happened ...  
  
Lex: Ok . Well lets bring Kouga !!!!!  
  
(Kouga walks out , ooo he so sexy)  
  
(Lex and TMK start drooling)  
  
Kouga: What ?   
  
Lex&TMK: Nothing !  
  
Lex: (wipes drool away) ok please take a seat .  
  
(Kouga sits)  
  
Lex: Ok my question why do you where a skirt ?  
  
Kouga: Because it's breezy and it's easier to take a piss .   
  
TMK: (twitch)  
  
Lex: Oh my .....  
  
Kouga: Next question !  
  
TMK: Uh , do you where anything under your skirt ?  
  
Kouga: Nope .  
  
TMK&Lex: Thank You Gentle Jesus !!!!!!   
  
Kouga: Anymore questions ?  
  
Lex: No , actually can I have your phone number ?  
  
TMK: Run Kouga , Run For Your Life ! She'll Jump On You And Hang On For Dear Life !!!!!  
  
(Kouga speeds out of studio)  
  
TMK: My work here is done .  
  
Lex: So is your life !!!  
  
TMK: Can't this wait till after the show ?  
  
Lex: Fine . Bring out Sesshomaru !   
  
Audience: Hurray !!!!!  
  
(Sesshomaru walks on ot stage and sits on chair)  
  
TMK: Ooooo , pretty ! Must touch big fluffy thing !  
  
Lex: Ewwwww !  
  
TMK: You have a sick mind you know that ?  
  
Lex: (giggle)  
  
TMK: First question , Do you hate it when people call you ' Fluffy ' ?  
  
Sesshomaru: Hell yea !! It makes me seem so un-manly ! They make me feel like I'm gay !!  
  
Lex: Calm down ! Next question , what is Rin to you ?  
  
( Sesshomaru thinks for awhile )  
  
TMK: Be warned if you say like a lover I swear I'll call the police !  
  
Sesshomaru: She's like a daughter to me .  
  
Lex: Awwwwww .  
  
TMK: Cool .   
  
Sesshomaru: But I always wondered what she tasted like ....  
  
Lex: As in food ? or what ?  
  
Sesshomaru: Food .  
  
Lex&TMK: CANNIBAL !!!!!!  
  
(tranqulizer shoots out and hits Sesshomaru in neck)   
  
Sesshoamru: What the (bleep) ?   
  
(Sesshomaru falls to ground)   
  
Lex: Sorry Sesshomaru ! (drags Sesshomaru and stuffs him in a closet).  
  
TMK: Well thats it for today , I need to go , cause Lex said she was going to kill me after the show .  
  
Lex: Oh yea thanks for reminding me ! Thats all folks !!! 


	3. Episode 3

(Lex walks on stage , TMK rolls onto ramp of stage in wheel chair)  
  
Lex: Welcome to episode #3 of The Torture Room !!!  
  
Audience: Hurray !!!!  
  
Lex: As you people can plainly see , I beat the crap out of TMK last time .  
  
TMK: The Pain !!!!!!!!!  
  
Lex: Shut up or you'll end up back in the hospital ! Our guests today are Naraku and Ayame . So lets bring out Naraku !   
  
Hurray: Aaaaaaaaaahhhhh !!! (audience panics)   
  
Lex: Everybody remain calm !!   
  
(audience sits back down in their chairs and shuts up)  
  
(Naraku comes out)  
  
TMK: Sit .  
  
(Naraku sits down , hey wait is he wearing M.C. Hammer pants ?)  
  
TMK: Naraku are you gay ?  
  
Lex: Hey ! I'm suppose to ask those kinds of questions !  
  
TMK: Well I'm askin !!  
  
Naraku: Uhhhh, yep .  
  
TMK: Cool . So who do you like on the Inuyasha show ?  
  
Naraku: I love Sesshomaru !!!!  
  
(big thud comes closet , Sesshomaru flys out)   
  
Naraku: Fluffy !!!!!!  
  
Sesshomaru: Shut up bitch , where my money at ?  
  
Naraku: Huh ?  
  
Sesshomaru: You owe me money , where it at ?  
  
Naraku: I forgot .  
  
(Sesshomaru murders Naraku and gets arrested , police try to arrest him but he ends up killing them too , now Sesshomaru is on the Most Wanted list , there will be more up dates)  
  
TMK: Ooooo blood !  
  
Lex: You're not a vampire are you ?  
  
TMK: Trust me , if I was you wouldn't be here right now .  
  
Lex: Oh .   
  
TMK: Lets bring out Ayame !!!!  
  
Lex: Who let that bitch in here ?! I'll kill them , she tryin to take Kouga away from the fans and me !  
  
(Ayame walks out like a hoochie)  
  
Audience: Booooooooo!!!!!!  
  
Ayame: Oh no you didn't (snaps fingers like you see some black or porta ricons' do)  
  
TMK: Haha , there will be no snaping in this studio or I'll kill you .  
  
Ayame: Bitch .  
  
Lex: Do you love Kouga ?  
  
Ayame: Of course I do , I'm havin his baby .  
  
Lex: You're not even pregnant .   
  
Ayame: I'll get pregnant then .  
  
( Lex pulls out a machine gun)  
  
Lex: Say hello to my little friend !!!!  
  
Ayame: Hello .  
  
(Lex fires gun at Ayame and her head gets blown up and blood goes everywear)  
  
Audience: Hurray !  
  
(Scruffy the janitor comes out and cleans up floor and drags body of stage)  
  
Lex: That was for all the Kouga fans out there !!   
  
TMK: OMG !!!   
  
Lex: You've been silent for a long time .  
  
TMK: Have you seen whats been going around today ? Naraku said hes gay , Sesshomaru killed him , and you just murdered Ayame !   
  
Lex: Yea this was a fun day .  
  
TMK: (takes in deep breath) Join us next time on The Torture Room ! Our guests will be Bankotsu and Sango ! 


	4. Epsiode 4

Lex & TMK : Welcome to Episode 4 of the Torture Room !

Lex: Lets bring out our first guest ! Bankotsu !

Audience : Hurray ! Woohoo ! We love you Bankotsu !!!!!!

(Bankotsu walks out all manly and stuff, drool)

Bankotsu: Hello ladies !

(Some chick runs up on stage)

Chick: Bankotsu will you sign my ass ?

Bankotsu: There will be no ass signing today!

Lex & TMK: OO........

TMK: Okkkk....take a seat.....drool

Lex: First question. Are you single ?

Bankotsu: Yes.

Lex: Will you go out with me ?!!!!!!

Bankotsu: I'll think about it.

Lex: Please !!!!!!(Gets down on hands and knees)I beg of you !

Bankotsu: Ok, fiiiine.

TMK: drool Do you like ramen ?

Bankotsu: What kind of dumbass question is that ?!

TMK: Waaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh !

Bankotsu: '......

Lex: Please forgive TMK, shes kind of confused....

Bankotsu: No, really ? I thought she was smart.....god you people are stupid.

TMK: Why are you so mean ?!

Bankotsu: I don't know.

Lex: Have a candy bar .

Bankotsu: CANDY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lex: oO....

TMK: Oo.......

(Bankotsu crams the cand bar in his mouth)

TMK: You got chocolate all over your face.....

Lex: Let me get that for you ( starts to lick Bankotsu's face, yummmm)

TMK: OO...no way ! Give me some ! ( Jumps on Bankotsu and starts lickin his face as well)

(Once Bankotsu's face is nice and clean, TMK and Lex sit back in their chairs)

TMK: Lets bring out Sango !

(Sango walks out)

Old Guy: Hey baby can I have cough your cough phone....hack

(Old man collapses from a heart attack)

Sango: Oh my.....

Lex: Have a seat please.

(Sango sits)

TMK: Do you like Miroku in any way ?

Sango: Hell No !!!!!!! 

Lex: Ya sure ?

Sango: 100

TMK: Hes got feelins for you.

Sango: He does ? No Way ?!

Lex: Yes way.

(Sango runs of stage screamin for Miroku)

TMK: Why do people always run off stage like that Lex ?

Lex: Who knows ...

Bankotsu: Idea ! I'll take you both out on a date !

Lex & TMK: Really ?!

Bankotsu: No. ( Some biker chick drives into the studio on a Harley, and Bankotsu jumps on the back)

Lex: OO....... 

Bankotsu: See ya later suckers !!!!

Audience: Noooooo! Don't leave us !!!!!( Audience chases after Bankotsu and the biker chick)

TMK: Well...thats the end. Tune in next time....for ......Jankotsu and Kagura.....you wanna go get a soda ?

Lex: Sure.

(TMK and Lex walk off stage)


End file.
